Thursday, February 23, 2017

Enjoy Every Moment, It Goes Too Fast...

Here it is again...my reoccurring theme of too much time passing between my last entry and this one. So much has happened since then and it all has gone by in a blink. Last week I received news that stopped me in my tracks. And it’s in the moments that you really stop and slow down and just want to take everything and hold it close- all while appreciating every little second of every day. While I was pregnant with Nico the most redundant piece of advice I received was, “Enjoy every moment, it goes too fast.” I mean I heard this so many times that I may have even rolled my eyes at a few advice givers just because I felt that it was being said to me on the hour every  hour. Now fast forward to present day and when I’m talking to expecting moms or meeting new babies for the first time I hear those words exact words coming out of my mouth. I also want to simultaneously grab them by the shoulders and shake them while saying those words over and over. It’s just so so true. And every day it somehow becomes even more true. Truer than true. Am I getting my point across on how I just want to walk around with a big sign with those seven little words? So because of that- I’m forcing myself to stop-I’ve sat at a computer for entirely too long already today for work and I’m just going to write about everything that has been in my head, knowing that one day I know I’ll want to come back to remember and more importantly cherish and appreciate every word.

Picking up after our “Big Reveal” blog we made it through the holidays sans cutting off digits and/or what seemed to be the traditional ER visit with Nico over the New Years. Hooray! Christmas was so so soooo fun with Nico this year even though we donated over half of his Christmas funds to other families so his gifts were few. Honest to God, while visiting Santa this year when asked what he wanted for Christmas he replied, “An orange”. So in actuality, he was overly spoiled even by his own standards since we got him an orange and more. Then add additional spoiling with our families- don't feel too bad for the kid-he still made out like a bandit. Before each gift he was given he would be all like, “Ohhh, wonder what’s inside!” But his best reactions was with the gift his Nonna gave him. We had a sheet over it and took it off after he inquired what it was and he saw his very own kitchen. He jumped up and down screaming, "What?!?! What?!? What?!?!" Priceless. Even after all the magic of Christmas wears off I’m always a bit relieved when the holidays are over. It’s such a busy time and rushing from place to place always gets to be a bit much and stresses me out. But then I think how blessed we are to have too much family, too many places to go, too much food…funny, if we just think along those lines how different our overall mindset can be daily as well. Gratitude is so powerful.




My favorite form of gratitude? Nico. So let's get back to him. I always forget where I leave off with Nico milestones and updates and looking back it has been since before his birthday in October. #badmom Since then there has been leaps and bounds in every area of development. We basically have a new little boy from the boy I spoke of in October. His movements are less like a little drunk man and more purposeful and accurate. He was running and it felt like I was watching a big kid. He was chasing after a small ball and he kicked it over and over and was so precise in his contact-I’m just like when did this happen? He use to need a giant ball and now he’s running around and accurately kicking small balls like it ain't no thang. To much of his father’s delight he’s been showing interest in playing soccer. “Come play soccer with me!” he will often say to both of us. And then he received a pair of "soccer shoes" as a Christmas gift so he’s always asking to put them on and telling us he runs faster with them.  His accuracy of even pouring things into bowls, cups, is better than my own (I blame pregnancy). Nico is also talking so well-which comes as a bit of a surprise to me since I was an Easter Seals child because I wouldn’t talk (look at me now ma!) and then the icing on the cake of Nico’s dad having ESL status- so even with poor odds against Nico's in the language department- I’m super impressed with his current abilities. I’ll precisely remember the day I came home and walked in and asked him how his day was and he responded totally appropriately. And then our dialogue went a little further and I thought to myself-holy crap we are having an actual conversation! Nico is quite the conversationalist-one day he touched his ear and goes, “Did you hear that?” I said, “Yeah, what was that?” His response, “A Dragon!” In trots Bellina and he starts laughing and says, “That’s not a dragon-it’s just Beana!” Or the time a few weeks ago where it was time to pick up toys and I started our clean up song that has worked like a charm since he was capable of helping with the (never-ending) process of clean up and he looks at me and gestures with his little hand and simply says, “I’ll watch you.” I was like ah, what? I didn’t even know how to respond- I couldn’t even come up with the words of how smart I think his little 2 year old brain is-so I just controlled my laughter instead and picked up his toys...as he watched me. Or how about the evening when he walks into our house after a full day of activity and he pulls off his hat and says, “Whew! What a long day!” I’m telling you he leaves me speechless- how can he be two? TWO! Oh and I loved this one the other day when I walked into the house after work and he says, “I’m so glad you’re home mommy!" Then in the very next breath-“Whatcha got for me?” As he peeks into my bag. He seriously cracks me up. Or another of his one liners, “Daddy you’re realllly tall!" Then walks over to me and goes, “And Mommy…you’re….ahhhh....not so tall.” And just the way he says things so matter of fact-boy, always keep that confidence in your words.

Speaking of being savvy he knows how to work it. He plays me. He plays his dad. He is all charming saying he's whoever's baby whenever he’s with that person-knowing it will get him more cuddles and affection. He knows how to get what he wants and will take me by the hand and very strategically walk me in the direction to whatever he in the end is after and casually tell me as we pass items-“Mommy’s flowers, Bellinas toys, Nico’s ball, oh! What’s in here?” Oh you know you little wise devil-it’s the screwdriver that you so badly want and because of your casual smartness here is said screwdriver to utilize as you wish (with supervision of course) because you’re so dang smart. See how I get played by him?

He still really enjoys eating to the extent of one day waking up and first thing out of his mouth was that he wanted to go to Nonna’s. I asked him for what and he goes, “I want cookies.” knowing that is the place you go for the goods! Like his dad he is extremely gracious and giving when it comes to food and making sure we are well fed. I’ll ask him if I can taste something of his and his reply, “Sure you can!”. Or even without asking he will say to me, “Give it a try! It’s tasty!” I mean I work with a lot of kids and everything is mine, mine, mine right? Nico was at the restaurant with one of his little friends and was asked if he wanted a piece of the chocolate by another adult…he of course said yes and then preceded to hand it to his friend! I was so shocked. Two years old? What two year old gives the candy first to his friend? Mr. Nico that’s who. I recently saw this graphic and thought it spoke nothing but truth....

Even though I of course think Nico is the smartest kid on the planet (haha...I'm his mom and am suppose to say that right?!) I'm most proud of his caring, giving, kind heart. We were recently at a party and he of course made friends with some of the other children. While playing with another boy running around a pillar in came a little girl who probably was just over a year old- as she was a new walker to join in on the fun. She was trying to keep up with the big boys running in circles and she tripped and fell. Nico stopped running, went over to her, crouched down and put his hand on her back to make sure she was ok. Pride, pride, and more pride beamed from my heart witnessing this from a distance knowing that his dad and I must be doing something right with this parenting thing. Isn't it truth in saying that you can be super intelligent but if you can't care/interact/get along with others-all the brains in the world can only take you so far? As it's perfectly summed up above teaching your children kindness should be our only priority as parents. The rest of the "stuff" will come. Amen? Amen.

Can I now go in further detail about how sweet he is? I was getting ready for work and he was heading out the door to nonna’s…most likely for cookies…and we had said our goodbyes and had given kisses and he turns around and says, “I’ll come back to you mommy.” Ah, can you say full water work tears after the door closed? I initially wanted to tell him to stop right there, let’s get that in writing and I’ll just need you sign here and again here and just once more with your blood that you will always come back to me. Sometimes I just want to shake him and ask him if he’s real and how can he make what is supposedly a hard thing so dang easy. Then I know he probably will answer me to wait till he is in his teens and he’s going to give his dad and I a run for our money. Or the alternative that our next child will make up in challenges for the both of them. So I kept my mouth shut knowing that I’ll probably eat my words in one way or another. In the past couple months his dad started to refer to Nico as Superman and himself as Batman and it's theeeee cutest thing ever. So this went on for a few weeks of in conversation Steve would be like, “You ok Superman?” and Nico would be like, “I’m fine Batman” until one day daddy came home with two figurines-you guessed it-one Batman-one Superman. Let.me.tell.you…it was like Christmas all over again. It was the coolest thing for Nico to have his own tangible Batman/Superman. And since then our lives have become nothing but superheroes. I’m proudly referred to as Wonder Woman at home now…which some days feels more accurate than others. And he can do anything with his cape on!
He said to me the other day something about the light on the ceiling and then went on to say, “It’s too high and I don’t have my cape on.” His logic-is something special. Oh and when you get your friends to be super heros with you that's a pretty proud moment.
But even Superman still gets owies and when he does he of course needs a Wonder Woman kiss to them to make them feel better so he will come over and instruct me to kiss his boo-boo and I can.not be a millimeter off if I am? He says, “No, no….rightttt.here” and this will repeat until he’s certain that I kissed exactly the spot he has specified. That Wonder Woman and her powers I tell ya.

Speaking of Wonder Woman-today marks my 29th week of pregnancy. I thought this pregnancy I’d be able to enjoy more and I’d allow myself to take cute weekly photos of my growing belly and celebrate each week…which I am celebrating for sure…but ain’t nobody got time for the picture part. Well, at least I don’t. Even if I did-my husband and I are usually only seeing each other in passing so maybe I can turn Nico into my own little personal photographer…ah scratch that. He’s my muse for my own photographic eye and he’s so much cuter than I- so think we will just keep it that way. But, I’m getting bigger and better by the day…and according to my husband so is my back end…he did leave out the better part…but I’m sureeee he meant to say it’s better as well. Right honey?!? Nico is also enjoying the bigger parts of me being pregnant and he will sit on my lap and point at my chest and ask me, “Can I lay in there?” Funny, his dad is asking the same thing. My husband continues to be a saint by making all my cravings and desires magically happen. I want some lemon water? Boom! He comes back with a bottle of fresh squeezed lemon juice. Oh you want a slushie or a chai tea? Sure, I’ll go pick that up for you! Stefano is very accommodating during pregnancies. It might be because there is an Italian superstition that if the woman doesn’t get her craving and then touches herself the baby will be marked for life in that very spot.  So I'm not sure if Stefano’s doing it out of the kindness of his heart or if he buys into those old Italian superstitions.  I mean he tries hard to do his best like when I send him out for groceries and he comes back with the wrong apples and I chew him out over it. I mean how can he NOT know we ONLY eat Pink Lady Apples or Honey Crisps! How dare he bring Gala Apples into our home! Then I kind of want to throw the apples at his head but control my craziness. I really do wish him the best over these next 11 weeks. He’s made it this far after all. Oh and about that 11 weeks thing? 11 weeks! We are sooooooooooooooo not ready. Like for real, not even joking. I think we both are still in denial about another baby coming. Truly, some mornings I wake up and I am laying there and then try to roll over and it’s like, “Oh yeah! I’m pregnant.” We have no room set up. No crib (yep, we gave it away and about 2 weeks later I got knocked up…typical huh?), no diapers, no nothing. The only person prepared is Nico-as he has 2 big brother shirts on queue in his wardrobe. I’m not overly panicking yet because new babies really don’t need that much and I’m kind of a get crap done person under pressure so I know things will eventually fall into place. Until then we will live in denial and make long drawn out decisions about our current living situation and in the meantime I’ll just keep enjoying food on demand. OK, being serious now-in times of big changes I find myself reflecting on life in general. I was recently driving and thinking of having to split my time and love between Nico and another child. The thought seems impossible and brought me to tears but then some wise words by someone in my life (can't recall who...sorry) popped in my head that you don't need to split your love because your love just doubles. Not sure how that is even possible but I'll let you all know if it is true. In the meantime, I want to tell and show Nico how much I adore him and how special he is to me. Knowing one day he will he will be reading this- I will even write it in words what I think every time I look at him....

Nico Baby-Even though you are getting smarter/funnier/cuter/bigger by the day know that when I look at you and always see my little sweet chubby baby smiling and you saying you will always come back to me. I love you and am so proud of you. I thank God for each and every day that I get to watch you grow. I love you my big boy.

So yes friends, it all just goes by too terribly fast and because of that I plan on cherishing every freaking second of it…and more importantly-not taking any bit of it for granted. Promise me you’ll do the same?

XO. 



JLOVE A.K.A "Mommy"